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Showing posts from June, 2019

Why I Wear a Bright Orange Adidas T-shirt Every Day

If you see a man riding his yellow mountain bicycle through Buena Vista Boulevard twice a day and wearing the same orange-neon Adidad t-shirt with white-striped sleeves, this is because I am trying to prevent my family from sneaking very tiny cameras onto my shirts. I had already proven in King of the Bullies how my family is in fact fitting my clothes with body cameras. Who wants to wear cameras?

Turning a Blind Eye with a Barely visible Wry Face

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Only Because I Left 10 Minutes Earlier...

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FBI Ordered My Sister to Trash the Chicken Dinner My Mother Prepared for Me!

On Thursday afternoon, June 27, I came rushing home from the library. I greeted my mother, telling her I was racing time. I had taken a quick glance at the stove at the dinner I believed was cooked for me. As I was getting ready to leave again--back to the library--my mother knocked on my door, informing me that my sister just dumped the chicken meal she had prepared for me. I glanced in bafflement at my sister before going out, who stood in the corner of the refrigerator, in the kitchen, in mysterious subdued silence. Later in the evening, I told her that she didn't have to dump the food, saying she could have eaten it herself, and she replied that she was giving mother a taste of her own medicine for having thrown her meals in the past to counteract her overweight. As I was watching a movie and eating an egg sandwich and chips, a red ambulance zoomed by shrieking, a small plane came flying, and several cars were driving by loudly, and I could not help feeling the FBI guy o